Monday, July 18, 2011

My Little Darlin, PT day 54, by David

Day 18 at Shepherd.  Jan continues to do well although it can at times be difficult to convince her of that.  She still needs assistance with walking and is unstable but she is walking with a walker and a hand holding her just in case.  It does not take much of this for her to tire.  For me to get her up and walk without the therapist I had to be "checked out".  Got this done today.  Not sure it was very smart on my part but my true love for her was tested.  Just before dinner she let me know that she had to go to the bathroom.  They keep the patients locked in for safety.  The tech came in unlocked her and asked if I would take her.  I said no problem.  Well as a good student I had to put her shoes on as told so she would not slip.  She let me know she was in a hurry.  She sat up and had to let the dizziness clear that she frequently has. It was then on.  She stood and started walking with my support but as she was heading towards the toilet with her wobbly unsteady gait and me desperately trying to hold her up and slow her down at the same time she was trying to drop her drawers in mid stride.  She let me know it was going to be close whether or not she makes it.  It was not close, well maybe some went in the toilet.  I will bet very few of you have been peed on by your spouse unless you were in severe pain from man of war attack.  Well now in addition to having been given a pneumothorax, hit in the head with a golf club, snookered into bungie jumping and others, I can now say I have been peed on by my wife and can laugh about it. We both did.  Any way with my new skill obviously unperfected at least now I can keep her moving through the weekend.  Jan was telling me yesterday about feeling inadequate by one of the cognitive drills the speech therapist had her do yesterday.  I talked to the therapist today about that who told me Jan actually did very well.  She wanted to quit when she was almost finished.  This is related to her difficulties when focusing on any one subject, the increased fatigue thinking now demands on her and her post traumatic difficulty with abstract thinking.  Most of the conversations she and I have are near normal.  There are things she has difficulty with that I see such as day and night.  She did not realize after taking a midday nap that she had been up this morning and had therapy sessions.  She has confused 4 in the afternoon with 4 in the morning.  I have to lead her to the right conclusion by pointing out that it is light outside, then lead her to if it is light then it is day and if day then afternoon.  She still jokes about being dain bramaged.  At lunch she was laughing at her self for joking she could drop pieces of chicken in her soup where they could not be seen making it appear that she had eaten more than she did so she would not have to drink her ensure.  She added that figuring this out should give her some points for thinking with the therapists.  A little of the competitiveness in her coming out.  I went over to the apartment to try and get a little sleep since do not get much in Jan's room.  Was not gone more than 2 or 3 hours.  When I came back the first thing Jan said was I am going home tomorrow.  She definitely is not ready and I try to convince her of this letting her know everything that others are doing for her here would have to be done alone by me at home and that would be impossible.  The things that seem to set her off from what she tells me are periods between therapy sessions when she is left sitting in her chair.  Bottom line to help keep her from wanting to go home so badly I will be spending virtually all of my time with her making sure she has little idle time.  I tell her with a smile she is a high maintenance woman.  Who needs sleep ;) but it is worth it to get her the most out of her time here.

It is amazing how a simple careless act  or lack of can create major life changes for others.  Do not ever think "it won't happen to me".  It can.  Do what you can to prevent this from happening to you or anyone else.  Routine and boring at home sure would be nice.


I Love My Little Darlin, we both miss being home more than can be explained

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