My Little Darlin, PT day 65, by David

Day 1, back in Mississippi

We made it home to Starkville today.  My little darlin made the trip in a normal vehicle (that is a pick up truck for those of you not familiar with what a normal vehicle is).  The only vehicles she has riden in since being rudely removed from her bicycle was ambulance to West Point, Helicopter to Tupelo and ambulence to Atlanta.  She did great today.  It was almost like old times, I drove, she rode, slept and snored.  That put a smile on my face to have her with me.  We stopped by Baptist Hospital in Columbus where I practice to see everybody.  Jan liked seeing them as much as they liked seeing her. Ditto for me.  Everybody knows the hard rode she has traveled and I think it is good for all to see her up and about.  Getting home is very nice but it does bring to the forefront realworld responsibilities that have been put off for two months although unavoidable.   First thing that has to be done is to make it as safe as possible for Jan.  As I mentioned she is still unsteady on her feet and is only allowed to stand or walk with my hand on her.  I must get grab bars put up in the shower and toilets.  I have nightmares about the possibility of her losing her balance, falling and reinjuring herself.  Our house is extremely cluttered.  This along with our numerous lovable and friendly dogs also make for potential hazards.  I have started working on the clutter.  The dogs, lets just say if Jan were made to choose who stayed, I would get the dog house.  I like them too though so we will just have to be careful.  Thankfully we did not need to worry about eating tonight, some of our good friends sent us a great meal.  It was GUD.  Lots of old mail.  I have been able to keep up pretty well with bills while away thanks to the computer and getting them brought or sent to me but there is still a lot coming in.  This includes the medical bills.  Never knew how confusing they could be.  I have no mind for business or accounting and have no idea exactly what I am supposed to pay when I look at these versus what insurance will pay or when.  I get the feeling the insurance companies play a game with the hospitals, physicians and patients but hopefully a few phone calls will sort this out.  Taking Jan to have her vision checked tomorrow,  she says it is not right since the injury.  No surprise there.  On thursday going to have a dental evaluation.  For those that do not know, her L front upper incisor was knocked out.  Our four year old granddaughter likes it because Mi-mama looks like her.  Jan also has pain in another tooth and we suspect it was cracked with the injury.  Next week we will go to the Quest program and let them figure out what her therapy schedule will be.  I am hoping to get back to work soon.  The primary limiting factor will be Jan's therapy days in Jackson and making sure someone can be with her 24/7.  Preliminary expectation for therapy will be three days per week but could be more.  This will free me up to cover on the weekends but I can't leave Jan alone yet so will either have to take her with me when I go in to the hospital or get someone to stay with her.  Sean my stepson is living with us now.  He moved in while we were off to take care of the house and dogs since we did not know how long we would be away.  He will definitely be an asset while he is here.   The expectation is that Jan will continue to have rapid improvement over the next few months but we are also told she will continue to have some improvement for years to come.  Brain injuries suck but she is doing great for what happened to her (TIGT)

SHARE THE ROAD, IT'S A LIFE
PUT THE !%@$# CELL PHONE DOWN BEFORE YOU KILL SOMEBODY
GET OFF THE COUCH,  LIFE IS FOR DOING STUFF
SUPPORT BIKE WALK MISSISSIPPI,  THEY WILL HELP MAKE CHANGES HAPPEN
BE BRIGHT AND BE SEEN

I Love My Little Darlin,  It is good to be home
David

My Little Darlin, PT day 64, by David

Day 28 at Shepherd

Today was the last day of therapy here at Shepherd.  Home tomorrow morning(TIGT).  We talked with the Neuropsychologist as well as physical, occupational and speech therapists.   Some of the primary deficits that Jan has and will need continued therapy for are her short term memory loss, executive level cognitive function, organization skills and delayed response.  These will get better with time and therapy.  Due to these limitations and her still being unstable with walking and transfers she will need to have someone nearby 24/7 for a while for her safety.  In an overstimulation situation she can become very anxious.  Too much outside input potentially makes it difficult for her to concentrate on the required task.  What we take as second nature can be difficult for her to process.  An example may be concentrating on stepping off a curb but forgetting there may be traffic coming.  Her walking is getting stronger but she does not go anywhere even to the bathroom or standing for that matter without me at her side.  She would have a very hard time keeping herself from falling if she stumbles and we certainly do not want to have to come back to Shepherd as a repeat customer.  We did a lot of walking including her walking to the parking garage, getting up into my pick up, riding to the grocery store, shopping (she got peanut M&M s and cokes for the staff) and rode back.  This was part of her planned therapy.  She also walked up and down a flight of stairs. This all sounds simple but from where she has come from this is all huge.   Her therapists are all extremely pleased with her progress and fully expect her to progress rapidly over the next six months.  She and I are able to laugh with each other a lot (TIGT) despite what we have gone through.  She also does cry a lot these days having a lot of fear for what bad might happen to her or those close to her(who can blame her),  she says she wants to stay home, cocoon and stay safe.  I guess the woman who did this to her not only almost took her life, gave her the injuries she is trying to overcome, affected all of us close to her but also suppressed Jan's sense of adventure, at least for now.  There are a lot of people that do nothing to contribute to the good of society but do an awful lot to suck from it.  Based on my limited experience of our laws, the law seems to enable this type of behavior.

SHARE THE ROAD, IT'S A LIFE
PUT THE !%@$# CELL PHONE DOWN BEFORE YOU KILL SOMEBODY
GET OFF THE COUCH,  LIFE IS FOR DOING STUFF
SUPPORT BIKE WALK MISSISSIPPI,  THEY WILL HELP MAKE CHANGES HAPPEN
BE BRIGHT AND BE SEEN

I Love My Little Darlin,  we are looking forward to the MMRC Quest program.
David

My Little Darlin, PT day 63, by Jan

Day 27 @ Shepherd.

Being Discharged from Shepherd Center (Atlanta) Tuesday and heading back to Starville!!

I will still require a lot of outpatient therapy, but can get that in Jackson at the Methodist Rehab Center in their "Quest" program.  We have heard some very good things about it.  It will be 3 - 4 days a week and we can stay with my son Derek and his family while we are in Jackson.

I am getting better every day and the staff here tells me how great I'm doing!!

I want to thank all of you who have sent cards, flowers, baskets, prayers and good wishes.  I have been told that many of you came by to visit me in the hospital… some of you I didn't even know… Thank you.

I especially want to thank my husband's partners… Mark and Robbie… who allowed him to be off work to be with me throughout this ordeal.

And finally, want to thank my fantastic husband, David.  He has stayed by my side the entire time.  He held me when I cried, got up at night with me when I felt so iil.  He is so faithful and dedicated… and I love him more than I can say.

SHARE THE ROAD, IT'S A LIFE
PUT THE !%@$# CELL PHONE DOWN BEFORE YOU KILL SOMEBODY
GET OFF THE COUCH,  LIFE IS FOR DOING STUFF
SUPPORT BIKE WALK MISSISSIPPI,  THEY WILL HELP MAKE CHANGES HAPPEN
BE BRIGHT AND BE SEEN


I can't way to see you all again.

Jan

My Little Darlin, PT day 62, by David

Day 26 at Shepherd.  My Little Darlin has been told everything that was done to her and what she has gone through the past 62 days.  What upsets her the most is when she thinks about what I was going through.  Man I love that woman, concerned about me when she went through what she did.  Occasionally she expresses some fear of having some type of set back.  I have told her how critically injured she was.  I suspect this would be part of a post traumatic stress.  She does express anger towards the person that did this to her(us).  We do not know if there is any remorse on the woman's part or if she learned anything from her actions.  We certainly have not heard from her.  I have wondered if she still drives and uses a cell phone at the same time.   No matter My Little Darlin is doing remarkably well and we are excited about Tuesday.  Jan had a good day today.  She is getting stronger.  Today at her insistence we went for several relatively long walks on the unit.  Last week I had to strongly encourage her to do a few short walks.  The dizziness is much improved if not resolved.  She still has back pain from her fracture when she is up for a while but that is relieved with tylenol.  Her appetite is much better.  She rarely says anything tastes "nasty" anymore.  She is doing great with the toilet dash training.  My shoes are staying dry.  Our friend Kim who was with her when she was hit came by today.  I got the feeling Kim was surprised when she saw how good Jan was doing.  She said if you did not know her you would not know she had been injured.  They had a good visit.   I think it did them both good to see each other.

SHARE THE ROAD, IT'S A LIFE
PUT THE !%@$# CELL PHONE DOWN BEFORE YOU KILL SOMEBODY
GET OFF THE COUCH,  LIFE IS FOR DOING STUFF
SUPPORT BIKE WALK MISSISSIPPI,  THEY WILL HELP MAKE CHANGES HAPPEN
BE BRIGHT AND BE SEEN

I Love My Little Darlin, home is where the heart is.
David

My Little Darlin, PT day 61, by David

Day 25 at Shepherd.  As you all saw by last nights post done by Jan she is doing very well.  I can see small daily improvements in her balance and gait while walking.  She does have some difficulty with short term memory but I think this will all improve over time.  I keep telling her over and over that before she was injured that she loved to cook, clean house and was overall very domestic.  She is not buying it.  Her long term memory was not affected.  Oh well it was worth a try.  We now have definite plans for the next phase of this adventure.  We are coming home.  On tuesday she is being discharged from Shepherd.  While Shepherd has a great outpatient program that I discussed previously there is also a similar program offered by Mississippi Methodist Rehab Center in Jackson called Quest.  She has appointments scheduled for August 2nd and 4th.  They will work with her so that she will someday be able to return to work in our bicycle shop Boardtown Bikes in Starkville.  We are very excited about going there.  Not only will Jan get excellent outpatient therapy but we have family near the outpatient center in Flowood and we can be home in Starkville on the weekends.  This will allow me to get back to work and at least give my partners weekend relief and hopefully soon full relief so they can have some well earned time off. TIGT.  While things are not going to be back to normal yet we are headed that way and are very excited about heading home after this two month plus ordeal,  especially with Jan doing as well as she is particularly when you consider where she was at the start of this.

Our roller coaster ride is starting to smooth out but there are still people out there trying to be healthy or just trying to get from one place to another that are in peril because someone is distracted, a driver is unaware the danger their automobile poses to someone not in an automobile, a driver does not see a cyclist or pedestrian as a life or even worse the driver has poorly explained anger.  The cyclist or pedestrian could also be placing themselves at increased risk due to not abiding by their own rules or not making themselves adequately visible.  We must stay vigilant.  What happened to Jan has and will happen to others.  We have to keep pushing and making as many as we can aware.  Seeing someone biking, running or walking on the road should become an accepted norm to all.  I will say again it should not be about the law (although that is the only way some will listen), it should be about that being a life.  It is someones wife, husband, son, daughter, friend or parent.  To think the person you are closest to is not going to survive or is going to be severely impaired because of a senseless act is something no one should have to experience.  Unfortunately I am speaking from experience.  Do not forget this and do not let anyone you know forget this so that you do not have to have this experience.  We must push to get the 3 foot law amended.  We must push for laws against distracted drivers.   If you are a cyclist you should also make sure you do the right thing, know your rules and be visible.

An added note.  Texas Governor Rick Perry who is also a presidential candidate recently vetoed Texas house bill 242 relating to texting while driving.  The reason given is that it was a government effort to micromanage the behavior of adults.  I hate big government as much as anybody.  I would be perfectly happy if I could be given the liberty to deal with what was done to me or my family without government interference.  I do not have that liberty so I expect this very expensive and inefficient government to take care of that (it did fail my wife).  Cell phone use while driving is killing people and is like drunk driving.  He may as well allow drunk driving.   He will not get my vote for president.

Thank you all.  Drivers watch for bikers and pedestrians.   Bikers and pedestrians watch for drivers.  All should know the rules and abide by them.  Be patient with each other.  No matter who is at fault if someone is severely injured or killed it drastically affects many and in a very bad way.   Everyone please do whatever you can to not let something like this happen.  Life is for doing stuff but not this.

SHARE THE ROAD, IT'S A LIFE
PUT THE !%@$# CELL PHONE DOWN BEFORE YOU KILL SOMEBODY
GET OFF THE COUCH,  LIFE IS FOR DOING STUFF
SUPPORT BIKE WALK MISSISSIPPI,  THEY WILL HELP MAKE CHANGES HAPPEN
BE BRIGHT AND BE SEEN

I Love My Little Darlin, home is where the heart is.
David

My Little Darin, PT DAY 60. BY JAN

Day 24 at Shepherd.

Hi everyone.  Jan here!!

Saul Raisin  stopped by my room today to visit with David and me.  What a nice surprise!!  For those of you not familiar with Saul, he was a professional bike racer who crashed in 2006.  He sustained severe brain injury and came here to Shepherd for rehab.  He had great things to say and was really an inspiration to both os us.  One important thing he said was that the hard part of recovery was still ahead of me.  It will take a LONG time to recover.  After 5 years he feels he has gotten much better,  and that I will be able to see a difference at 6 months, one year, two years, etc.  The hardest part is waiting and accepting my condition.  He's right.  I want to be fully recovered right NOW!!   I used to be so smart, and had no limitations.  Right now I have trouble solving logic problems and walking.  He suggested that I ask all of you to help by pointing out to me when my behavior seems out of character.  Now, let me just say that cursing out nurses is NOT unusual behavior for me… Merely a good way to make enemies.

Love to you all.

Jan

My Little Darlin, PT day 59, by David

Day 23 at Shepherd.  Jan continues to do well.  The dizziness with nausea is still doing pretty good since yesterday morning's bad episode.  This morning she walked to the central area for breakfast.  Her walking is limited and she is too unsteady to walk without someone's hand on a support belt incase she falls but she is still doing it on her own power.  I like to pick on her about her grandma shuffle walk.  She can laugh at herself about it.  She says this is especially funny when we do the team toilet dash.  I still get a kick (and start getting nervous for my shoes) when she starts trying to drop those drawers before she reaches the toilet.  When she says she has gotta go she means it.  She had several therapy sessions and during a 30 minute break had me get her up early soother was no wasted time for her next session.  She was supposed to be taken to the grocery store today as part of her therapy.  I was waiting in the room when she came rolling in in her wheel chair crying her little eyes out.  The grocery store thing did not go well.  They were taking several patients.  It was hot.  Jan was loaded first and she with her wheel chair were locked in place.  The heat and anxiety was a bit much for her and she could not do it making them get her out.  She was brought back to the floor but had some difficulty with finding the room on her on which added to her anxiety.  We talked with the therapist and will try again but this time will do it in my vehicle and I will help.  I will have the a/c going full blast too.  I met with her attending today and her case manager.  She will be discharged from inpatient setting on tuesday.  Shepherd has an intense outpatient program called pathways.  Jan and I would stay in the same housing I have been in here at the center.  The pathways center is a few miles from here and I would drive Jan there each day during the week.  We can come home on weekends.  There would be five hours of therapy each day.  I am unaware of anything similar in Mississippi.  There are outpatient centers that could offer therapy but I am not aware of any that are to this extent.  The case manager will confirm this.  I do want Jan to have the best she can get.   This would likely be the very best option for Jan's maximal recovery.  Jan is considering this but i am not sure if she will go for it.    I do not think she is completely aware of what her limitations are at this point but her physician was impressed with the insight Jan had when I told her that Jan said she did feel she needed more therapy.  She told me tonight that if she gets all this therapy we are talking about that everybody back home will expect her to be normal.  She says she is a goob right now.  I think she is beautiful.  There are other issues besides what Jan is going through that I can not ignore.  This is life.  I suspect similar thoughts must go through others minds who are or have been in a similar situation.  Costs for one.  This whole ordeal is very expensive (but the results have been priceless).  Insurance will not cover it all.  Many have commented about the liability of the person that did this.  If they have nothing then they have no liability in this state / country.  You can not get blood from a turnip.  Jan and I have worked hard all of our lives and have been fortunate.  We will survive this financially.  I do not know how most are able to afford the expense of something like this and there are many here who are much worse than Jan(we are unbelievably fortunate in this regard).  We have been away from home for a long time and miss it.  Jan has made no bones about it she wants to go home(I do too but will do what is necessary for Jan).  I have two wonderful partners that have worked their ass off covering me and let me know being here with Jan is where I need to be.  I will forever be grateful to them.  My conscience bothers me tremendously the longer I am away.  So long as I can work I know I can take care of Jan, but I also need to be with her to take care of her (and she needs me now more than ever).  What a conundrum.   Nothing about any of this has been easy but seeing my little darlin improve daily makes it tolerable.  We are going to make it, this phase is almost over.  Everyday we are one day closer to normal (TIGT).

Thank you all.  Drivers watch for bikers and pedestrians.   Bikers and pedestrians watch for drivers.  All should know the rules and abide by them.  Be patient with each other.  No matter who is at fault if someone is severely injured or killed it drastically affects many and in a very bad way.   Everyone please do whatever you can to not let something like this happen.  Life is for doing stuff but not this.

SHARE THE ROAD, IT'S A LIFE
PUT THE !%@$# CELL PHONE DOWN BEFORE YOU KILL SOMEBODY
GET OFF THE COUCH,  LIFE IS FOR DOING STUFF
SUPPORT BIKE WALK MISSISSIPPI,  THEY WILL HELP MAKE CHANGES HAPPEN
BE BRIGHT AND BE SEEN

I Love My Little Darlin, 
David